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When Numb Becomes Your Survival Language
“I wish you would open up, Krystina.” I hear it a lot.From family. From friends. From strangers who follow my story online.But what they don’t understand is…this guard I carry wasn’t built…it grew. It grew from everything I’ve survived.It’s not a wall I consciously put up.It’s muscle memory.It’s my default setting.It’s the way I…
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It Wasn’t the Accident That Broke Me
When I tell people what happened to me,I always pause when I see the look on their face. That wide-eyed shock.That “Oh my God, I’m so sorry.”The disbelief.The pity. But what they don’t know….what they could never guess….is that the most traumatizing part of my storydidn’t happen in the car.Or the hospital.Or even the…
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Wearing My Tragedy Like a Clunky Watch
If I’m being honest…I’m exhausted. I wouldn’t wish this condition on anyone.Not because I don’t have strength… but because this kind of strength shouldn’t have to exist.The loneliness that comes with it is overwhelming.And the truth? Talking about it makes people uncomfortable. But not talking about it?That’s what almost broke me. I live with…
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Do SCI Patients Have Pain?
Oh, pain. My long-lost friend. Soulmate.How I wish you’d give me some time to miss you. As a recovering C6 Asia A complete spinal cord injury (SCI) survivor, pain is an all-day, every-day occurrence. Whether it’s: • The burning sensation that feels like frostbite meeting a heater,• The muscle exhaustion from overusing the few…
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This Wasn’t the Plan
This Wasn’t the Plan This is not how I pictured I’d be living my life at 34.But here I am.Every glorious inch of me wretched in pain…nerve pain, muscle pain, musculoskeletal pain…pain pain, if there is such a thing. Sitting on my shower chair,too tired to cry, too numb to scream.Smoking a blunt, balanced…